HOW ARE YOU?

Last week, I was on the phone with one of the people I learn from, one of my mentors, and we discussed a lot of issues ranging from Nigeria to when I want to marry. She gave my answer a long laugh, after she asked what I am waiting for, and said I was deliberately avoiding the topic because I was scared of marriage, I insisted I was not but I just need enough before I will bring in the Mrs. She explained how it is never "enough" when it comes to marriage and all. Some minutes after I ended the call, she called me back which is why I am writing this.

"Isaac do you know that in the past three years that I've known you, you, my husband and kids are the only people who call just to know how I am doing?" I kept mute because I did not have an answer to that. She when on to say "for that, I will give you anything you ask of me", I was like "Wow, to the half of your kingdom?", she laughed and said "Yes my boy". Now let me explain something here, this woman is a "made" woman, like seriously established international business woman, she appeared on covers of magazines and have had articles written about her in many more. So it is only natural for her to get a million phone calls, emails and messages a day with more than half being request then the others business demanding her attention, approval and whatsoever. To her, the world and all the people therein are either demanding her time, attention or resources all the time, she is not relaxed both in mind and spirit because of societal, family and occupational demands. When such a person sees or finds someone who is calling just to know how they are doing, they feel the weight of the world being lifted up from their shoulders. 

Do I have requests and demands to make and ask of her? You have no idea how many but being me, a semi-mentally detached young man who knows what it means not to be able to meet a request, who also knows that when someone ask something of you, it means they have looked at  every direction but choose you because they have confidence and trust in you to deliver, and when you fail, it dashes all hopes. I personally feel super bad when I can't meet up whatever a person asks of me (even though I've learn't over the years that you cannot satisfy anyone and some people deliberately pick you because they feel you are their "cash-cow", go-to-guy or simply the one that I can disturb). It feels really overwhelming to have an ever demanding network of people, work and society, that is aside the one nature and life in general expects from you.

A simple "I just called to know how you are doing Ma" led to what she termed "one of the real conversations I always look forward to because I get great relief knowing that someone somewhere cares about my well being". I can only imagine the number of people whose phone calls she avoids, rejects or have even placed a ban on, I can also imagine the joy and excitement she gets whenever she sees a call from the few of us that call to ask "HOW ARE YOU ( or simply its acronym H.A.Y)".

Being human, it is more than a second nature to be selfish because when it comes to survival, man will do anything to survive and as broad as that may be, it boils down to we always demanding because we feel our survival depends on how satisfied and comfortable we are so we keep demanding/requesting from both men and God forgetting the fact that they too, no matter how highly placed they are in life have demands (God inclusive- He demands praise, honor and worship from us). Thus, whenever a call is made without the topic reading "REQUEST FOR... or DEMAND FOR..." a burden is lifted and a torch ignited so much so that when it is consistent, an open cheque is provoked..."for that, I will give you anything you ask of me".

God is as a matter of fact the originator and chief operating officer of this very principle, He knows we are selfish and more but He also expects us to thank and appreciate Him for the things He has done already hence the saying "when you thank God for His fingers, you will see His hands". Not that He can't do without it but it gives Him all the more reasons to grant and open cheque and be more involved in our affairs.

In conclusion, it is Okay to be selfish, it is Okay to demand and request things from both men and God but it is better to ask men "How are you" sincerely without demands/request and it is best to Thank God.

PS: I am yet to start thinking about the THINGS I want from her.

#STAYFOCUSED

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