FLASH BACKS

MEMORIES

I recently met an old 'sweetheart' after a very long time and we decided to hook up and chat. While waiting for the roasted fish we ordered for to be ready, all I could talk about was our childhood, the sweet old memories growing up, the ups, downs, sweets and bitters, the funny names we called each other. I was lost in my thoughts so I just bring up whatever memory I could remember from the old box in my head and kept reminiscing on the past. I did not notice I was talking with only a few laughs and 'inputs'- no conversation, till she asked point blank "why are you so obsessed with the past, why bringing it up?". Trust me, I did not think twice when I replied "it is because that is where we are coming from and forgetting where you are coming from means you don't know where you are standing or where you are going to". There was a long silence after that (I was actually thinking about her questions), then it hit me, I am not only bringing back good memories but the bad and the ugly, I am talking about the 'good old days' because that is what it was to me but I don't know what it means to my 'sweetheart', it might be very bitter or sour and then again it might be 'sweet' but going round it creates a 'belittling' emotion or whatever she wants gone with those times.

I then thought of the many annoying times Aunt Linda came to our house and on each occasion expressed her "shock" at how much I 'have grown' (as if she was as pretty as she was when I was ten, with her wrinkling face and those strands of the grey hair that refused to be dyed along with others). Anyways, it then occurred to me that as my days were adding, as I was growing and learning through all the experiences life tossed my way so was everyone else, I was not the only one that went through that phase (although we all went in and came out through different doors), time and chance dealt with us all equally, the rain fell on us and the sun shone on us all the same albeit different locations and times, we've all been dealt the same cards just a different casino and croupier. The only difference is the hand we held and our attitudes towards what the outcome was, and is going to be because it is a continuous process. Some of us hit the 'jackpot' at the first deal, others are still giving it a shot hoping their turn comes at the next deal, which might never come for some, while some have folded and left after a few bad hands.

With all those thoughts, I broke the ice, by complimenting on the dress and the hair style to which I was quickly notified on how old it was and how the following day was already scheduled for the salon, we started a conversation that I never imagined will happen, I even received lectures on topics ranging from her office politics to new trends in the fashion world without noticing when the fish was served. 

I went home thinking of how much we all allow the past hold us back and how much vacuum we are creating in the present by holding on to the past. I have grown up, so have you, I have memories, so do you but there is a reason why remembering the past appears as 'FLASH BACK' in movies and real life, because we are meant to 'FLASH' back not "DWELL' back, we are in the present to create new memories, that we are bound to still 'flash back' to in the nearest future...start creating a beautiful memory for your future this very day, you are allowed to 'FLASH BACK' but never allowed to 'DWELL BACK'...

#STAYFOCUSED.